Trouble in Paradise? 3 Signs It’s Time to Talk to a Marriage Counselor

Keeping a marriage healthy is not easy; it takes two committed people to make it work. With everyday stresses like your children and your career, your marriage can get pushed to the backburner. It also doesn’t help that every day we are bombarded with messages of having a “soul mate” and that our life partner should be able to meet all of our needs. Best friend, confidant, perfect lover, provider, safety, and comforter—that’s a lot to expect from one person.

It is important to remember that we are each responsible for our own happiness; no one else is. However, if you are experiencing bumps in your marriage, assistance from a marriage counselor could be beneficial.

Amber Luhtala, behavioral health consultant at Memorial Counseling Associates, shared three signs that may indicate it’s time to seek help from a marriage counselor.

1. You can’t communicate without arguments. If your relationship is non-stop friction, speaking to an outside person can help. A marriage counselor can give feedback on how to improve communication, including tips to help you speak more calmly and clearly.
2. You feel emotionally disconnected. People can feel ignored or unappreciated, which can lead to a stressed relationship. A marriage counselor can give you ideas on ways to reconnect emotionally and intellectually.
3. You can’t agree on finances. Money is a tricky subject and can lead to heated arguments. People have different values and priorities when it comes to finances. A marriage counselor can offer ways to help you both come to an agreement on finances. For example, instead of having just one joint bank account, each person could set up separate accounts and a shared household expense account.

When all else fails, remember, don’t sweat the small stuff and think before you speak. Is it really worth complaining to your spouse about not picking up the extra gallon of milk at the store?

If you think your marriage could benefit from counseling, please contact Memorial Counseling Associates at 217-788-4065.